How to choose friends ?

This is very difficult to find out, that too before you want to enter into the relationship! Nonetheless, Hinduism gives some clues on how to choose the right persons you want and what would be the consequences of your relationship depending upon the type of the person you are in relation with.

There are THREE types of persons in the world, broadly speaking. The first one, the best person gives importance ONLY to Dharma, the righteous living and nothing else. This type of persons are the cream, the peaks of the humanity. These people don't care anything but, dharma, the righteous living. They don't care wealth, position, name or fame or anything else. They love ONLY dharma. If something goes against to dharma, these people will abandon you or the world itself. So, it is very very difficult to get along with these people and easy and pleasurable too if your are really good. If they find anything wrong in you they will try to put you on the right path, if you could adjust it's okay else they will cut your relationship. These persons don't bend for anything in the world, but only to God and Dharma, nothing else.

In the famous Hindu epic, the Ramayan, Vibhishan, the younger brother of the anti-hero, Ravan comes under this first category of persons. Vibhishan, tries to correct his brother Ravan many times but, in spite of his teachings, Ravan is not convinced and continues to do bad things. So, vibhishan has no other way. So he left the company of his brother Ravan and joined with the hero of the epic lord Rama, by seeing his Dharma, righteous living and good conduct.

These type of people are the best to have as your friend or relative or spouse. But, it is difficult to stay with them in these days, because, these people are very fixed onto Dharma, the righteous living. They can't tolerate even if you do some minor mistakes. They will try to keep you on the correct path, if you don't hear to them – your relationship wouldn't continue any more. But, if you are also a lover of dharma, the righteous living, these type of people are the best for any relationship. On the other hand, it is very difficult to find these type of people in the world these days, in the days of Kali Yug.

The second type of persons, love nothing but people. Once they love you they will not desert you whatever you do. Even if you do bad or wrong things, they will not desert you. These type of people are attached to people they love and not to dharma or anything else. If you are in relationship with these type of persons, you could live happily although you do sins or bad things they will not abandon you.

In another famous Hindu epic, MahaBharat, the persons supporting the anti hero of the epic, Dhuryodhan, come under this second category. All the brothers of Dhuryodhan, Karna, Aswatthama – all come under this category. These people are un-conditonally supporting and loving Dhuryodhan, whatever he might be doing. In all his bad and sinful doings too, they were supporting him. While Dhuryodhan was misbehaving with Droupathi, the heroin of the epic, these people were all supporting him and they didn't say or do against him. They were ready to give their life for Dhuryodhan and really they gave their life in the great war of Kurushethra.

So, if you get these type of persons, your life will be very happy. More happier than the first type of persons really speaking. Because, with the first type of persons you could get conflicts now and then, but, there would be no conflict at all with the second type of persons. So, you would be more happy to live with this second type of persons. But, this is not good for you. Because, a good relationship should correct you whenever you go wrong and these people are falling short in this regard. But, you will not get any problem from such people, only happy living. They will not cheat you, they will not harm or hurt you. Hence, these type of people too are good for any relationship to have.

The third type is the most dangerous type. This type of person always looks for his own personal goals, selfishness in every relationship. As long as this person's ego is satisfied, through dharma or adharma – they will be with you. Once, they get some better opportunity or change somewhere else, they will not even think to abandon you, to harm you. They could cut your throat to fulfill their self.

These type of people are NOT present in the ancient epics too. I had searched for them but, i could not notice them in the ancient Hindu scriptures [please mention under comments, if you know such persons from any epic]. In the epic Mahabharat, the uncle of Kouravas, Shakuni – although he is very cunning, he is a different type of person and he will not come under this third category. Shakuni, had a different plan of action, to avenge for the death of his father and brothers. So, he was with king Dhuryodhan and fulfilled his wish and planned it in a clever way.

So, if you could get the first two kinds of persons in your life for any relationship, you will not get any problem from them, what so ever, you are sailing in a safe boat. But, be careful to know and avoid the third kind of person from your life. They might be acting good for the time being but, in the future they are sure to bring problems and troubles into your life, could be deadly problems from which you could never recover later in life. Such blows they will deliver onto you, such dangerous persons they are. Be cautious about these actors and avoid them at the earliest and you will be safe. They might be doing some minor helps or favors to you but, later on they will deliver the great blow to you. It's like a fisherman throwing something to the fish in order to catch it & kill it. So, be cautious with this kind of persons! The gentle man like men!

Hence, from the above discussions now I guess, you know which type of person you should allow into your life for any relationship ! So I sincerely advice you to be cautious with the third type ! Good luck dude ! God bless you to notice and avoid the third, the dangerous and the most populous in the present World.

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