All
the major religions on the globe want the wife and husband to be loyal towards
each other and condemn all sorts of extra material relationships unanimously
and the Hinduism does more so. Here, I NOT am going to comment on the ‘sin’ of
‘it’ rather I will describe how you fail to grow or ‘evolve’ or how you are spoiling
yourself, your ‘inner growth’, your evolution.
For
any occurrences there will be many outcomes and for this too there will be many
bad consequences, but I am focusing on the ‘inner’ deterioration due to the
extramarital relationships. The Hindu religion includes ‘extra-marital’
relationship under ‘maha patak’, the ‘great sins’ and there should be serious
reasons for it otherwise the sastras [scriptures] will not warn so seriously on
the matter.
Before
telling the wife and husband not to cheat it is required to state the
significance of the marriage. The Hinduism says marriage is a sacrament and
just it is not an agreement between a man and a woman for sensual enjoyment.
A
man and woman are united by a ceremony of marriage – just not to lead a secure
societal life but, much more is involved with the marriage. Just it is not a
physical bonding to satiate the physical needs of the two human animals but,
much higher things, sublime things are involved with the marriage. If only the
physical urges are to be fulfilled as many think in the modern age then
marriage is not in need.
The
marriage is primarily meant for the inner growth through controlled
transformation of the sexual energies present deep within the individuals.
According
to Charles Darwin, the life forms ‘evolve’ from one species to the other
species during the course of their struggle for survival. The Hinduism is not
denying this concept of this ‘evolutionist’ but, it says much more than Darwin.
Darwin just said that ‘life forms’ are evolving, but Hinduism says – ‘you’ are
evolving too, the ‘you’ represents the ‘soul’ in you. The Hinduism says – it is
only you have been evolving through countless birth and deaths – passing
through all these different ‘forms of life’, these different creatures.
Darwin’s point is that the struggle is for ‘survival’ but, the
Hinduism says - the struggle [of all the beings] is for ‘evolution’ but, of
course all the creatures are not aware that they are struggling for
‘evolution’. Does a kid, rising and falling to walk - know it is struggling to
grow, to ‘evolve’? We people think we are struggling for ‘survival’ but, the
fact according to Hinduism - is that we are all struggling to ‘evolve’ – but,
we might not know it. The struggle we [all beings] do for ‘survival’ is in fact
for the ‘evolution’, the ‘inner growth’.
Now,
you are in the ‘human form’ and no more physical ‘evolution’ is there but you
grow within. Once, the ‘soul’ has taken the human form – there is no more
physical evolution but, the ‘inner’ evolution begins now. This ‘human life’ is
not an end in itself. Speaking in the words of Charles Darwin - we have
struggled a lot to get to this ‘human form’ in the evolution – but, this is not
the end of the journey. Now, on wards we have to ‘grow within’ unlike the
evolution we had in the past, the physical evolution.
In
the ‘Bhagavad Geetha’ – lord Krishna says – uddare naatma
naathmaanaam. It means ‘you’ have to grow on yourself, you have to grow
within. This is exactly where the marriage comes into play. The animals need no
marriage in order to ‘evolve’ because their evolution is just ‘physical’ but,
‘we’ need to evolve internally so, naturally we need so many rules and
regulations in order to evolve. The ‘marriage’ is the easiest system that helps
a ‘man’ or ‘woman’ to evolve ‘within’.
We
have some drawbacks and the sages of Hinduism devised some ‘intelligent’
methods for the ‘inner growth’ just by using our ‘drawbacks’ or ‘weaknesses’.
This is like the intelligent use of the winds for sailing on the seas. The
‘sexual need’ is one such draw back and we can exploit it for our ‘inner
growth’ – according to the Hindu Scriptures.
Suppose
a ‘boy’ and a ‘girl’ - are married. Then if they are loyal to each other – the
boy thinks of his ‘girl’ and the ‘girl’ thinks of her ‘boy’ while away from each
other – of course – this attraction might be ascribed to the ‘sexual need’.
This way, when both of them continue thinking and longing for each other – they
will start to do simple sacrifices for each other and now the ‘sexual urge’ in
them will slowly transforms or it slowly sublimates into the higher form, LOVE.
If they live like this – they go reach a stage where they can do sacrifices for
each other and even they could ‘feel’ can ‘die’ for each other. At this point
they don’t care for themselves – in loving their beloved – the bodies becomes
secondary and they are coming out of their bodies i. e., their personality
grows out of the body – to embrace something else too. Both of them are growing
‘within’ or in the words of Darwin – they both are ‘evolving’.
The
starting point for ‘love’ is through ‘sex’ and it starts easily when you are
‘loyal’ to your spouse. But, it is difficult to ‘ignite’ love in the other
ways. Once, the ‘love’ starts it grows without end and later it becomes
universal in nature, loving one all.
‘you’
will start by loving your ‘wife’ or ‘husband’ and it ends at loving the feet of
‘god’. So, in order to make the ‘love’ possible and grow, in other word for you
to ‘evolve’ – you should be loyal to your wife/husband. If you cheat your
‘wife’ or ‘husband’ – your might feel happy at the present – but, just you are
cheating yourself by ‘harming your evolution’.
The
other point is that – we have some ‘inner energies’ within ourselves. If ‘you’
touch another person your ‘inner energies’ are disturbed, if you are sensitive
you could feel this. This is the reason – many of the Hindu spiritualists
dislike to touch or to be touched by others. If you are rash you might not feel
this ‘inner disturbance’ when others touch, but, if you are sensitive enough
‘you’ will feel the ‘pain’ at the touch of others. Here, it is needless to say
that – the sex will disturb your inner energies to a great degree. If ‘you’ are
with ONLY your spouse then this ‘inner disturbance’ will help both of you – to
grow, to evolve for these ‘inner energies’ will come to a harmony.
But,
if you keep on kissing or mating with different people ‘your’ inner energies
will get polluted and you will come down the ladder of ‘evolution’. You will
turn rash and rocky – and you will lose your peace too. This ‘you’ could
observe in prostitutes, most of them are rash.
Apart
from ‘reversing’ your evolution on your own due to your ‘extramarital’ sex –
you will become ‘sinner’ as all the religions are warning and this will make
you to suffer later. This is because - when you are polluting your ‘inner
energies’ you will fall down from this ‘human’ level and so will take some
inferior birth and as described by Darwin ‘you’ will have to struggle to
‘evolve’ for this you have to struggle again and naturally ‘struggling’ is a
punishment for anyone. But, the religions will simply say this as ‘sin’ effect.
So,
if you are cheating your spouse – you are cheating yourself and going back on
‘involution’ - to suffer later. The Hinduism warns, those a leading ‘illicit’
life will go back to be born as ‘animals’ later and it is very difficult to
take the human birth again. Of course, it is difficult to be loyal especially
these days but, it is worth it. Good things are hard to practice but, the results
are very sweet indeed.
Stressing
again these are not the only reasons, there will be many more reasons unknown
to me. Without some severe reasons, the scriptures will not condemn it,
stamping as ‘maha parak’ or the ‘grate sin’. If I fail to understand the
reasons – will it become wrong?
Choose
your ‘evolution’ but not your ‘involution’. Good luck !
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